Tuesday, November 17, 2015

Mating rituals in a second life meat market


You know you're truly bored when you decide to go to one of second life's meat markets and profile perv.

I visited the Chamber on a Saturday night that I was free and Linda was not. It brought back good memories of when I first met her, though the lag was so great that I could barely move around.

Nevertheless, I managed to sit down and take a gander at the crowd.

The first thing any newcomer will notice is how silent the entire place is, even though the room and the surrounding terrace and stairways are chock full of avatars.

There will almost always be a few people who are engaged in some desultory local chat, and once in awhile some forlorn person will announce to the group how he's on voice, but for the most part the place is so quiet you could hear a mouse fart, as people mostly profile perv in preparation for the night's activities.


This is also because the first rule of meat marketing yourself is to directly IM people who interests you. Talking to someone (or everyone, as in a friendly greeting)in local chat can be effectively used to highlight attention to yourself in a crowded market, but for the nitty gritty work of actually reeling in the nightly catch, the privacy and intimacy of private IM is the preferred method.

Once you have settled into a good conversation, it is customary to physically move closer together, even though in Second Life you could be half a world away and still engage in all sorts of shenanigans via IM, up to and including frenetic and wild slex. Couples who are standing close to one another and facing each other are considered to be paired up, at least temporarily, and it is normally considered bad form to interrupt one of them with an intruding IM.


If things do not go smoothly, and the two find themselves either at odds with one another or suddenly bored, you might find them separating again after awhile in order to continue to profile perving other avatars. But if the stars align, then things get interesting.

Most meat market sims have separate play rooms, and you might find some newly-paired couples deciding to make use of the freebie toys in them. This is always good for a short chuckle to some of the voyeurs in the remaining crowd, who might by this time welcome any respite from the boredom of reading so many fatuous profiles.

The more likely scenario though, and especially in the high end sims where the customers are relatively old and well-off, is for the couple to TP out of the place and back to their more secluded and comfortable homes.

Probably one of the most-oft asked questions is whether these meat markets actually work, and the short answer is "it depends". Linda and I met in one such place (even though neither of us was actually actively looking for someone), so I do know in some cases you could find someone special. This is because the main advantages of such places are that (1) the presence of large crowds increases the likelihood you will find someone compatible, and (2) most people are there to find someone, so it's less likely you'll IM someone who'll be annoyed at your conversational gambit.

In the end, even if you're not really in the market for someone, hanging out in such places and profile perving is an interesting way to spend a few downtimes, even if only to smile and laugh at some of the funny profiles, or learn from the profound ones.

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